Leaf Me Alone!

Maintaining a relationship is never easy. Once the SEEDs are sown, they have to be showered with care and love. Should any quarrels break out, couples should LEAF no stone unturned. It is important to get to the ROOT of any problem and WEED out any potential causes of ill-feeling. If the BRANCHES of the relationship can withstand any storm, it will BLOSSOM and FLOWER into a real beauty, and the couple will enjoy the FRUITS of their labour.

Just Shoot!

The photographer got FRAMED for SHOOTING someone. Rather unfortunate. The authorities ZOOMED IN and whisked him away in a FLASH. He SNAPPED upon receiving news of his arrest. Evidently nobody had a CLEAR PICTURE of what's going on and the lack of information could further MAGNIFY the problem. His RESOLUTION now is to be set free.

The Australian Airbase

My friend, a pilot trainee was posted to Tamworth in Australia recently. He will only be there TAMporarily. Hope the TAMperature is fine and that it won't be too TAMperate (as a result of a TAMpest). Maybe he will be able to enjoy a nice meal of TAMpura there, accompanied by a nice glass of TAMarind juice. Maybe picking up TAMil will be useful. Anyway, as a trainee, he will probably have to come up with several TAMplates for presentations, and they must not be TAMe. It is also important that he does not TAMper with the aircraft equipment. Overall, it should be a WORTHwhile experience for him.

Saving time as a Secretary

Life as a secretary requires a lot of time. The job scope focuses mainly on taking MINUTES, hence we must listen attentively with HOUR YEARS. Sometimes we may be required to SECOND certain decisions about to be made, and to take note of which issues have been finalised and which are still TEN-THIRTY-ive. We must always fulfil HOUR duties no matter how WEEK we feel.

Stop calling people names!

1. He likes to work out. Jim
2. He steals from other people. Rob.
3. He likes to sing karaoke. Mike.
4. He likes to shake his head up and down. Bob.
5. He writes books. Arthur (author)
6. He likes to lie on the floor in front of doors. Matt.
7. They love fruits. Apple, Olive...
8. They love flowers. Rose, Daisy, Jasmine...
9. She likes meat burgers. Patty.
10. She collects coins. Penny.
11. She enjoys reading. Paige.
12. She's a philantrophist. Charity.
13. She catches fish. Annette.
14. She likes to settle disputes in court. Sue.
15. He/She shines. Ray.

Wheels of Change

In our country, the MRT has a good track record. To many people, it is rail-ly a very important source of transport. The main driving force behind the growth of this system was fuelled mainly by the increase in population. The MRT system has indeed grown rapidly and it has evidently been steered towards success. I hope the current people managing the system will continue to station themselves at the helm of the company. It would not be good to close the doors of many people hoping to find work.

Stuff from the Singapore Armed Forces

1. My friend works in the intelligence. I wonder if he has become any smarter. Must be rather challenging for him

2. Which 2 items in the field pack are used by aliens? E.T stick and blade (E.T - Entrenching Tool)

3. Lots of chairs were required for the SIT Test (Short for SITuational Test)

4. Where are talented drawers posted to? Arty (Short for Artillery)

5. When a Captain or someone higher in rank wants to make a 2-bar lieutenant do push ups, he cannot say "half-left down"; he must say "full-left down" (2-bar lieutenant is often referred to as a full-lieutenant, pronounced "full left")

6. Which small plant do militaries send to fight wars? Infant-tree (Infantry)

7. (From no. 6) What is a main training exercise for infantry units? Root (Route) marches

8. Which soldiers are the experts in their various fields? Specialists (Perhaps this is more a fact than wordplay)

9. What post do Mats normally hold in the barracks? Bang I/C (Bunk I/C)

10. If you have any questions regarding this theory lesson on the M16 rifle, just shoot.

11. Why are spiders brought outfield? They provide webbing. (The webbing is a vest-like component of our Skeletal Battle Order)

12. Why can soldiers be good carpenters? They drill well

13. Which rank of army personnel are good at leading a team of sportsmen? Captains

14. Which rank of army personnel always cause large problems? Majors

15. Those who sentence others to death? Corporals

16. When do most of the soldiers faint? Passing Out Parade

Stuff from the Singapore Armed Forces